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The Crime on Cote des Neiges (1951) by David Montrose

Good Reads meta-data is 233 pages, rated 3.23 by 57 litizens. 

DNA: O’ Canada.

Genre: krimi; Species: Noir.

Verdict: Round and round we go, and finally land.

Tagline: Montréal sans Quebecois.  

Tough guy drinks himself silly, punches out old men, slaps women around and thinks that makes him Mike ‘The Man’ Hammer, or something.  He goes hither and yon in English Montreal, never crossing Boulevard Saint Laurent. Whew!  Everyone lies, everyone is crooked, everyone gets killed.  Well, almost.  Unravelling the plot is ingenious, but uninteresting.  

It pulls a trick I had never encountered before with the doppelgänger, but then did not make much use of it. Tant pis.  

It is all too obviously inspired by reading Mickey Spillane at the time.  But it lacks Spillane’s snappy dialogue. There are two or three  other titles by the author from the same period. But this one is probably enough for me.  

Neiges’ is snow for those that must know.  In Quebec the snow slope would that facing north. 

It’s all Latin to me.

Ad Infinitum: A Biography of Latin (2007) by Nicholas Ostler

Good Reads meta-data is 382 pages, rate 3.77 by 455 litizens. 

Genre: History (not biography)

DNA: Linguistics.

Verdict: Granite.

Tagline:  Vivos lingua mortua.   

A zombie language, Latin has had a long half-life.  As late as 1840 it was the legal language of the political assembly in Hungary.  It remains the common language among scientists well into the Twenty-first Century and that fact lives on in the Latin names for plants and animals, including our bones.  Law schools test graduates on the use of Latin tags. In these ways, and a few others, it remains a universal language.  Sort of.  

In one of Ben Pastor’s World War II novels The Road to Ithaca (2017) an English prisoner want to tell a German officer something dark and deep but it is impossible to do so without being overheard, and so he tries Latin…and it works.  

Presidents of the European Union have, at times, communicated in Latin so as not to favour any one language of the Union.  To wit, a recurrent Finn in that office issued weekly summaries in Latin, thereby employing Latin scholars who had no students.  Perhaps somewhat in jest, two, at least, of the Harry Potter’s tales have appeared in Latin translations.  

In the Sixteenth Century Renaissance the tiny educated minority of men in Europe had a common language, Latin.  Erasmus from Holland, Thomas More from England, Niccolò Machiavelli from Italy could have all talked or corresponded in Latin. 

Or could they? Did they have regional accents that limited comprehension?  Did they all use the same syntax? German, Danish, and Dutch all evolved from the same Frisian core and geographically they are much closer to each other than the far flung Latin speakers, but they are not one language.  Did Dutch Latin, English Latin, and Italian Latin have similar differences? Then there was the Latin exported to the elites on the edges of the Empire in the Levant, or the North Africa of St Augustine, or Scots borderlands, or the Black Sea shore. I found no answer in these pages.  

Thomas Hobbes translated his book the Leviathan into Latin to insure its immortality, he said.  He had learned this from his employer Francis Bacon who wrote in English but had all of books translated into Latin to reach world’s learned readers.    

Much of the history of Latin is the history of Rome from Republic to Empire to its long decay.  Though curiously enough Latin did not always rule the roost in Rome itself where one important sign of distinction was to speak Greek.  Even in Cicero’s day as the Republic became the Empire, Greek was still the preferred language of the Senators who killed Caesar. In his exile Cicero literary efforts were animated partly by the goal of making Latin into a contemporary language.  Huh?

In the Eastern Roman Empire of Byzantium Greek was the language of culture and power, but even so, that European toe of contemporary Turkey was and is called Rumi for Roman.  

Emerging in Latium, Latin was the language of farmers with a rich vocabulary, mainly descriptive, for that bucolic life.  Poets long found it good for a pastoral celebrations of sights and sounds. But it lacked the abstract and conceptual registers of Greek, and these Cicero and others later set out to rectify.  The pendulum swung too far and for hundreds of years Latin became ever more elaborate, ornate, and rhetorical until the foliage overgrew the meaning.  

When Latin became the language of the Christian faith an effort was made to reverse engineer it, to simplify it so that believers could understand the services, the spoken texts, and the sacraments.  Ironic then that today Latin remains the language of Catholicism but the few if any of its followers understand the language now.  Protestantism spoke the vernacular when it split from Rome.  

The spread of Christianity travelled down Roman roads and was communicated in the language that the Romans had sown far and wide, but farther and wider in the West than in the East where Greek hung on as the language of the literate and the earliest Bibles.

Though Roman roads carried Latin, the Roman Republic and Empire made no effort to sow its language.  Where Rome ruled administration, law, army, and tax was conducted in Latin but there was no requirement of any local person to learn it.  The author makes a distinction, which eludes me, between Romance as the everyday languages of the Empire and Latin.  Best I can fathom is that Romance was like Chinenglish, Singleish, or Franglais, a miscegenation of Latin and the local vernacular, and so it varied for one place to another, spawning the family of Romance Languages.  

Latin was never the universal language of humanity, despite many claims to that effect, because much of the world never learned it in Asia and sub-Sahara Africa. By the way, it was exported into Latin America, and had takers up north, too.   

It was also gendered in that during the long history recounted in this book, few women learned it and fewer still used it.  It was a male prerogative, though the author pays due respect to some few exceptions.  Ergo, the Liberal Arts were the arts a free man was to learn to value, use, and keep that freedom.  Down my long bow I see a connection between the decline of liberal arts and the rise of general ignorance that now sweeps across many lands.  

Why is it called Latin and not Roman? It is a good question that the author raises but cannot answer.   

From Cicero on Latin modelled itself on Greek, and in the forensic investigation of Greek gave birth to the concept of grammar.  Centuries later this notion of an underlying structure would emerge in all those books or rules and usage. 

***

The book is replete with interesting tidbits of information but the prose is hard and far too technical for this reader, contrary to the newspaper blurbs quoted on the back cover.  I also detected the shadowy presence of Noam Chomsky, which I always find distasteful.  

If there is the appetite, this author has several other books on language.  

Opposites attract, right Desdemona?

Attraction (2017)

IMDb meta-data is a runtime of 2h and 12m, rated 5.6 by 14,121 cinematizens. 

Genre: SyFy; Species: First Contact.

DNA: Russia. 

Verdict: Thoughtful.

Tagline: Oops!  

The aliens may have superior technology but when a fuse blows, well it blows, and the next thing you know a gigantic space ship is cartwheeling down the street in central Moscow, leaving a path of death and destruction behind.  Was the pilot under the influence of vodka?  What now? Indeed, a good question.  

As per the script of It Came from Outer Space (1953), and we even see the name of lead from that film on a poster early on, the aliens just want to change the fuse and go home in time for the big game. Problem is, no fuses.  Inspired by Qantas, UFO management has decreed no spare parts be carried to cut costs.  

How do the locals react? That is the main focus of the film.  Of course, the army is much in evidence, and politicians posture – at a far safer distance than the troops.  But stop right there. The usual stereotypes from The Arrival (1996) or Arrival (2016) have the week off.

The army officer is cautious and the troops are disciplined, and he advises patience, after all we shot it down.* While one politician pontificates for the camera, the minister is no hurry to make a mistake. Putin is too busy grooming Trump, so he delegates a minister to deal with the aliens to ensure deniability.    

No doubt the reluctance immediately to launch into shoot ‘em up has put off many raters. (There is a sequel where this thirst is quenched.)

We see reactions among students, soldiers, citizens whose family and friends were killed in the crash, and more, but no churchman.  Of all the unscrupulous charlatans, you’d think they would be well represented, but no.  

The cinematography is superb, as are the effects and CGI, as is the acting, especially from the the thirty-year-olds playing high school students.  No irony intended, because they do it well.  Best of all, no brilliant geniuses, that lazy cliché of far too many screenwriters who project their own wishful thinking in that trope.

Nonetheless, several of my well-worn complaints apply. It is far too long. The similarity of the lover boy and alien is confusing.  Why does the alien sport designer face fuzz, after all, and why did he shed the impenetrable armour? Early on not quite sure how the armour clad alien communicated with the colonel. What was the point about water?  Why didn’t the alien(s) remain in the indestructible ship? Nor how Pauline escaped from the peril of the crumbling apartment building.  How did they get into the hospital?  The transfusion, well….  Loose ends, there are many.  

Still far more intelligent and insightful than the Hollywood block busters of this ilk.  Right up to the explosion of violence in the last 30-minutes when it descends to the arrested development of La La Land.  

*The blown fuse took out the stealth cloak, and once revealed, the Red Air Force shot the indestructible (?) UFO down and it crashed in middle of Moscow, but no where near the Kremlin.  Too bad.  

Strange, but untrue.

Murder in the Museum (1980) by Jo Frisbie and Gunnar Horn

Good Reads meta-data is 177 pages, rated by 0  litizens!   

DNA: Aksarben.

Genre: Krimi.

Verdict: Slow and steady wins the race.  

Tagline:  Very slow.  

It was a strange museum display to begin with and it got stranger when a cadaver was slipped into it.  But if you can suspend that disbelief what follows is a small town (Red Cloud by another name) mystery.     

There is a lot of dithering, confusion, and some repetition but it is all credible, if annoying.  Life is like that. 

The county attorney and sheriff (both elected officials) combine and sometimes clash to sift the evidence as the plot is thickened with another corpse.  But I got confused because on page 95 some clues are spotted and bagged then twice later on pages 105 and 160 their existence is denied.  I must have missed something. Maybe I blinked. Ç’est la vie

The authors have combined on five other stories, one of which I read ages ago. They are hard to find so try Abe or Alibris. 

By the way, Murder in the Museum is a well used title.  I noticed at least a half-a-dozen other instances.  

Jack, Jack did it!

The Day of the Jack Russell (2009) by Colin Bateman

Good Reads meta-data is 284 pages, rated 3.96 by 1272 litizens.

DNA: Ulster.

Verdict: More to come.

Tagline: [Woof!]

The man with no name is back, stumbling into the thick of it again.  Hiding from the world in his bookshop where customers seldom venture and those few that do are driven away by his indifference or the vitriol his mother, who often fronts the shop, saves for…, well, everyone, he is suborned by a wad of black cash that Inland Revenue will never know about, to track down two yobbos who defaced a billboard featuring the smiling visage of a Freddie Laker.  Much offended, this Freddie would like a stern word with them.  

Identifying and finding them proves to be easy, but, well, no sooner does he report them to Freddie than the yobbos are topped. Gulp!  Has he become an accessory before the gruesome facts?  Plod certainly thinks so.

Nameless has no choice but to clear himself by finding the culprit(s).  His pregnant on again off again girlfriend is recruited, his layabout sales assistant is conscripted, his poisonous mother gets in the way, and as they bounce around there is the dog.  Everyone and I mean everyone seems to be after that Jack Russell, known as Patch: the Northern Ireland Police Service, MI5 and 1/2, Freddie, rival drug dealers, an IRA remnant, and the taxidermist.  Yep, taxidermist.   

It is almost a mile a minute, apart from innumerable asides about Nameless’s health, his dislike of everyone else, his cantankerous mother, his long suffering girlfriend, and lectures on etymology.  While he can and will recite the definitions of ‘focus’ he cannot do it. 

Moreover, there is little detecting, and just a string of lucky guesses.  Still I enjoyed the sarcasm with a dash of cynicism.

This is a volume in the Mystery Man series that included Dr Yes which I commented on sometime ago. Click on for enlightenment.  

Play ball!

One Shot at Forever (2012) by Chris Ballard

Good Reads meta-data  is 255 pages, rated 4.28 by 2,867 litizens.

Genre: Non-fiction; Species: Condescension.  

DNA:  [Jaded.]

Verdict:  Clichéd.

Tagline: Meh. 

A small rural high school baseball team in Illinois succeeded.  This is so astonishing that Author investigates.  In 1971 this was a team that could sometimes field only nine players, with a coach who knew nothing about coaching, from a school with an enrolment of 250, and yet it defeated teams with professional coaches from schools enrolling 9000. Out of 370 high school teams in the state  this one emerged. What was the secret sauce to their success?  

What follows is an account of two high school baseball seasons.  It seemed to be written as an aspirant film script with villains, and climaxes.  Even so the odour of disdain arises from page one, and lingers.  The characters are too often painted as black or white to create tension.  The descriptions of the games are perfunctory as though watching animals in a zoo across a moat, through a steel fence, or behind unbreakable glass.  

Chris Ballard

Yes, it is true that I did not warm to the book.  While the story is great, the telling does not match that.  

In addition to the undertone of snobbery from the big city boy author about small town life, it ignores much of the full story.  Most, if not all, of these boys played American Legion baseball in the summer after the high school season ended, where they had much more practice and coaching, and this is mentioned, well, I can only remember one time but let’s say twice.  Would this experience have not affected their skills and attitudes?  One way or another, the answer is yes.  

While the context of the Vietnam War is underlined how it applied to these boys on graduation is omitted.

It is no surprise that it gets a higher Good Reads score than a far better book, i.e., Bottom of the 33rd.  That fact simply confirms my prejudice about those who contribute to that source. 

To judge from the blurb, the book had noble ambitions but…  [See above.]  These include the impact of high school sports on the players and on their families and communities.  The roles of teachers as catalysts to stimulate the formative years.  The glue of teamwork. That the purpose of the strong is not to bully the weak but to help them, making both of them stronger.  It is a good list but it does not grow from the text.  

‘I may never come back…’

Bottom of the 33rd (2011) by Dan Barry

Good Reads meta-data is 255 pages, rated 4.08 by 2,415 Scrooges.  

Genre: Nonfiction; Species: ‘Informed Imagination.’ 

DNA: Horsehide, Grass, and Ash.  

Verdict: Wonderful!

Tagline: Hope. Frustration. Redemption. Resignation. Life.

Things went wrong from the start.  In the dilapidated stadium, the lights would not go on for the 7:30 pm start time.  An ominous portent. When a technician summoned on that cold night of April 18, 1981, Saturday before Easter Sunday, found a way to turn them on, the payback was that they remained on … until 4 a.m the next day. The site of this marathon  was McCoy Stadium of P’tucket in the Ocean State of Rhode Island.  

Stop right there!  Any 108-stitch baseball fan knows that date and place.  If not, get thee to Cooperstown, right now! 

In this early season AAA International League game the Pawtucket Red Sox hosting the Rochester Red Wings (Orioles) entered the Twilight Zone with no way out.  Jean-Paul Sartre said, in Hui Clos, ‘Hell is other people’ (Amen!), in this case it was another inning.  And another. Thirty-three times, while each team waited for Godot to deliver the game winning hit and to set them free.  

‘Baseball is life and life is baseball’ sums up this story of the players, umpires, fans, families, passers-by, owners, managers caters, groundskeepers, who populated this bittersweet moment, ah, hours, and hours, as the temperature fell.  If life has meaning, debatable I know, then so does baseball, and, perhaps, vice-versa, if baseball has meaning, then so does life.  

What brought these people together in this performance of the theatre of the absurd? How did they react to this Sisyphean labour? Where did they go after this purgatory?  Did those endless innings scar them for life? Some answers to these questions are gleaned in micro-biographies on more than a dozen of them.

Taking this extraordinary game, the longest ever played in ‘organised baseball’ (i.e., the North American Major Leagues and their minor league affiliates), as a case study, the author dissects the allure of the diamond for players (who hope to rise to the top in MLB, or reluctantly realise that they are sinking not rising), spectators, families, batboys, teenage girls in the concession stands, and lonely old men who prefer to sit apart in the stands. 

The result is a tour de force.  

In the course of the game, it is clear that some players are destined for the Elysian fields of the Bigs, while others need a day job – soon. The hopes of the latter have grown old and brittle in an Odyssean  journey around the minor leagues; among them is an infielder for whom the Red Wings is the fourteenth team he has played for in just over a decade of wandering through the minor leagues, earning just enough…to need a working wife. At twenty-eight or even twenty-five, most of these men are baseball-old, in a game where youth is almost everything.  

At times it is the team manager’s job to tell one of them that this is it. He will never ascend. Yes, he can hit.  Yes, his glove is good.  All true here in AAA. But the rosters are full of just such athletes, and he does not stand out among them.  Enjoy the moment, because – look up – the curtin is falling ever faster with each birthday.   

Dan Barry

Pedant’s Corner. It seems the curfew rule was accidentally omitted from the AAA Umpire’s Handbook that year, and so the umpires had no express authority to end the game.    

* * *

The author did impressive research with even more impressive empathy, developing biographies of dozens the participants it seemed, giving many of them their own voice from the inside out to reflect on baseball, that game, and their lives.  It is touching, amusing, and poignant all at once.  

Needless to say, but say it I will, the pygmies have reviewed it on Good Reads.  (Apologies to pygmies for the comparison. If someone can suggest another metaphor for the small-minded gnomes who just have to criticise for its own sake to feel, briefly, smart, please let me know below.) 

P.S. One golden summer while I was in college, I was the official scorer at Legion games for the local paper, and I read much of this story from the standpoint of that job. How in the world would a scorer fit at 33-inning game into a scorebook. The ones I used allowed 3 extra innings.  Moreover, how would a publishing deadline be met. Ah, yes, the author not only explains how this scorer dealt with these problems but shows us the result. Ingenious, if nearly inscrutable.  

Gunner Asch I

The Revolt of Gunner Asch (1954) by Hans Helmut Kirst 

Good Reads meta-data is 240 pages, rated 3.90 by 330 litizens.

Genre: Fiction.

DNA: Deutsch; Species: Nazi.

Verdict: Meticulous and boring. 

Tagline: One man’s war against the Wehrmacht from within.  

In late 1938 or early 1939 in a small garrison town in northern Germany Herbert Asch is a reluctant draftee who observes the absurdity of military life.  In the main the insanity is common to all armies. Any veteran will recognise the characters and situations, though in this case there is the added frisson that we know which way the wind of history is blowing, but Asch does not.  

As is typical in all-male groups, efforts are made to identify and abuse the weakest link.  For simplicity sake, Kirst limits this behaviour to the NCOs, and they focus on a harmless and hapless conscript who is a friend of Asch.  Driven nearly to suicide by the relentless abuse, Asch saves this friend and declares his private and personal war on the Wehrmacht. 

His heavy artillery are the many convoluted, contradictory, and obscure rules and regulations that govern army life.  Think of Jim Kirk talking a computer to death and that is Asch’s approach. With a blizzard of references to regulations, sub-paragraphs, dictates, and more, he soon rattles the leader of the NCOs into a blunder.  

For armour Asch uses the general indifference of officers to events in the barracks, as long as it does not blot their own personal careers.  The best way to insure that does not happen is never to record irregular occurrences, like fights, like lost ammunition, AWOLs.  If these things happen, and they do, and if they are recorded, then it means the relevant officers have failed!  Although daily reports are written in indelible ink, where there is a will, there is a means…  If they happen and are not recorded, well promotion remains within sight. 

Asch’s infantry are the records he makes himself by observing the petty grifting, marital infidelity, and absences of the NCOs.  This black book of data settles much hash.  

Hans Helmut KIRST

The telling is precise, but, well, holds little interest to this reader.  Asch’s campaign is the subject of at least three over novels by Kirst, but I am not at the moment motivated to continue.  It bears a passing resemble to Catch-22 but it is neither as funny nor as poignant as that novel.  Moreover, the shadow of hindsight darkens it.  

The Incomparable Babe!

The Tomb that Ruth Built (2014) by Troy Soos

Good Reads meta-data is 238 pages, rated 4.26 by 127 litizens. 

Genre: Fiction; Species; Krimi.

DNA: De Bronx.

Verdict: Safe!

Tagline: A drag bunt! 

A year that has lived in infamy: 1920, when the Boston Red Sox committed original sin, selling George Herman Ruth’s baseball contract to the New York Yankees. Ruth’s sportsmanship and showmanship gave the Yanks three years of untold prosperity.  Bankrolled by Ruth’s draw of fans to games and long desirous of their own turf the Yankees built Yankee Stadium in two years. (That is less time than it takes to get a pot hole filled in a local street in most places.)

At the dawn of 1923 the NYYs were bound for another pennant and now had THE stadium.  It was not a ‘field’ (Ebbets), ‘grounds’ (Polo), ‘park’ (Shibe), ‘bowl’ (Baker), no it was a ‘stadium’ of Roman grandeur.  (Though built to last its final at bat was in 2008.

Into this shiny new temple of baseball stepped a Yankee team based on THE BABE, who lives up to expectations on the field and down to them off the field.  Somewhere along the dugout bench is Utility infielder whose curiosity is surpassed only by his carnal love for baseball. Well, he probably sleeps with his bat and glove ready to get in at midnight.

The fun begins when workmen putting finishing touches on The House find a corpse stuck into the wall behind a concession stand on opening day.  Mum’s the word! With President Harding in the stands no one wants to spoil the party with this sordid detail, moreover, the owner does not want the brand new stadium cursed with this cadaver, so he asks/directs Utility Man (whose few baseball duties give him plenty of time off) to find out what happened on the QT. Why him? Because the victim was a onetime teammate on his journey through the majors. This is New York City 1923 and the police couldn’t care less if there is no cut for them.

What follows is a lot of baseball, though none of it bears on the krimi plot, and some digging by Utility Man to backtrack the victim. In addition to the baseball asides, there is a diversion into the film world of D. W. Griffith that tails away into nothing.  Likewise, the rookie Utility befriended in the early pages disappears.  Despite assurances that he would be rewarded for his efforts, there is no justice and after Utility Man figures it all out, he is cut to make way for a strapping rookie name of Gehrig. 

Tony Soos

On the brighter side, the baseball is palpable, the characters are clearly distinguished, the human side of Circus Ruth is revealed, and the plot, albeit only a third of the book, makes sense. The mix and match of historical and fictional characters is seamless. It is the seventh in a series that has many more titles. I read one years ago set in Wrigleyville (figure it out or go home), and liked it.  Still earlier I started one set in Green Monster Nation (ditto) but failed at a flood of clichés in chapter two. Still two for three is some average!  

Ruth in the early stages of his celebrity is well done.  He is already being eaten by expectations both on and off the diamond. He knows it but is powerless to resist the siren call.  

Silence, please.

Le dernier combat (1983)

IMDb meta-data is a runtime of 1h 29m, rated 6.7 by 6643 cinematizens.


Genre: Post apocalypse.


DNA: France.


Verdict: A quiet version of Mad Max.


Tagline: Sshh.


Man roams around a destroyed world of office buildings, defiled apartments, crashed American cars, pursued by four or five other men. Nary a word is spoken, nor is there a tendentious narration so de rigour in Hollywood to explain and blame the situation on the audience. It just is.  


He flees on his Leonardo da Vinci homemade airplane to other, equally desolate parts.  


Meanwhile we meet the Doctor hold up in his clinic fending off a lone Barbarian at the gate.  Man and Doctor unite against Barbarian, but, well, he is a Barbarian and subdues them, but Man escapes.  


Yes, in a bow to Hollywood conventions there is a woman to fight over, in fact, two of them, but they have but five minutes of plot time. Most of the time director Luc Besson, before he surrendered to Hollywood, shows that a little can be a lot.  (A long way from Valerian where a lot is a little.)


It makes no sense but moves at brisk pace, and hangs together, almost.  Only two words are spoken. Correction, only one word is spoken but it is spoken twice. ‘Bonjour.’  


I watched this from my private collection via Plex in a hotel room in Canowindra (look it up).